Saturday, April 25, 2015

Too Broken

Lately I've felt the Lord just constantly stirring in my spirit and burdening my heart with such urgency for the souls of the hurting, broken, and lost. 

Then I realized that this is how we should feel all the time! 

That's how God feels about His children- an urgency for them to come to know Him and we should have the same attitude to see our own brothers and sisters come to know Him too. 

I realized this during a retreat that I went on with my Africa team and as soon as I did, Satan began attacking me in what seemed to be the little ways. My team sat around one another and we began to share our testimonies. As soon as we started, I began to think mine was too broken and that mine was too weird and that I only needed to share things in my life similar to the others in my group. For the first time, I didn't want to share my testimony. I didn't want people to know who I used to be and how broken and rebellious I used to be. 

However, God has completely different plans and when I opened my mouth and started, I shared everything except two aspects God is still working on me in putting into my testimony. {If you want to read my testimony click here: http://notbondagebutfreedom.blogspot.com/2014/12/here-it-goes.html}

But besides that- everything. 

Our testimonies were supposed to be around 4-5 minutes long and mine ended up being 9. Even after laying it all out there for my team, satan still told me I was too broken for the people I'll be ministering to in Africa and that they won't be able to relate to my testimony. 

I then got really quiet and didn't like being attacked because I've felt God in the strongest ways lately and didn't feel Him in that moment and I realized I had gotten too prideful of that- of God working and moving in my life and feeling invincible. 

I went to sleep in prayer and with close friends praying for me and woke up and in doing my quiet time I decided to read Psalm 62 because of a song I've grown quite fond of. {If you want to listen to that which I strongly encourage click here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5nXhvJ0i5w}

In reading this, I felt so encouraged and revived and realized that I'm not invincible by any means but that God within me IS and He will NOT fail. 

God ALONE loves me and cherishes me and fights for me. 

I strongly encourage you who read this to read that passage and even listen to that song. 


  • No testimony is ever too broken. 
  • Who you are now or who you have been is never too broken or messed up for God to use. 
  • He has you where He wants you and the season He wants you in for a divine reason. 
  • God will use you wherever you are and will lead you in what He wants you to do and will place people in your path that you're able to help and able to minister to. 
  • You are not broken and neither is your story. 


Psalm 62 directly tells us that God is our refuge where NO enemy can reach us. He ALONE is our rock and salvation where we will NOT be shaken.

In writing this Psalm, David doesn't say that it's God + our control (or whatever), he says that it's God + Nothing

The word "alone" is mentioned 4 times in this chapter and in every context being in God Himself having all of the power and strength and being the One we should base our trust and faith upon. And because God alone has ALL the power, the enemy cannot harm/ touch us. 

The people who bring you down in life- God says their words and actions mean nothing and are lighter than a breath of air.

The things done against you do not define you. 

God Alone Is Our Steadfast Rock And Hope And We Will Not Be Shaken.

No comments:

Post a Comment